letting out steam

"Jordan, you cannot make it for everything, you suck at everything."

I haven't had someone say this to me for a very long time. Fortunately, I was criticised for something I dont have much passion in. My reason for being here is simply to pass time and learn something new, and hopefully to love it. But because of you, your character and personality which I begin to despise, Im losing interest in things which I thought I would eventually come to love.

You probably want the best out of us, or you simply want to instil fear in us, or maybe, you want to show your authority... I thank you if your pick was number 1, but il definitely despise you for the other choices. I may be blur, lazy and playful at times, but is there really a need to treat me like a child? Are you really that mature for me? I certainly think not.

Encouraging your juniors can be done in many ways, but fishing them out one by one, putting them down in front of all the others, saying things like "you suck, you cannot make it", isnt going to do. You tell everyone "Im very straight-forward a person and I dont care how you feel." Your insensitivity wouldnt make you a very well-liked person, and you already ain't.

Your plan to instil fear in me interestingly hasn't worked, you may want to check that out. I know a personality like your's pretty well. And I expect you not to care at all, because you are probably full of yourself and we, are the lowly ones.

But I thank you for encouraging me the hard and crude way, even though with a simple polite sentence, I would have already gotten my butt moving. And I thank you for encouraging me, at the bold expense of you becoming well-disliked.

I thank you, once again.

alone in the snow...2:22 PM

Roughing it out again.

Got enlisted into army. Seemed tough at first due to settling down in a totally interesting military environment. Its fun I must say, and I pretty much enjoyed all 9 weeks of my Basic Military Training. Then Lady Luck sat on my lap and said, "Jordan, go for the auditions and try your best to get into the SAF Music and Drama Company." I did, without any expectations at all. And then bang! One month later and here I am learning to be a host and a Hip Hop Dancer. Life in MDC is different. It actually prepares you for all the bullshit you get in the working world. It imbue valuable skills which you can use later in life!

Its extremely unfair to say that life in MDC is easy and makes you a sissy. If you think that way, then fuck you! Dont speak of something you havent experienced yet. You work out everyday, you body becomes badly sore, you work on saturdays frequently, sometimes over 8 hours, you get scolded if you are not improving, you face crowds of jeering and vulgar audiences all the time etc... Its a totally different kind of tough, its more of psychological and emotional training, especially for a person who knows nuts about dancing and hosting:) But yet again, I cant complain because im learning so much!

Time flies so quickly and I am already into my 8th Month in the army. My memories of travelling solo in eastern europe and living the lovely life in Finland is still vivid and clear. Then I think to myself, why must being in the army stop me from travelling? Thats not fair, I have the right need to fight for the things I enjoy doing, and that is my passion for travelling!

And here I now with Operation "Trio", where I plan to travel by train and bus from Bangkok's Hua Lamphong Station, to Aranya Phrathet, and then on to the notorious town of Poiphet (Cambodia), Siem Reap to see the Angkor Temples, Phnom Penh to check out the central market and Tuol Sleng Torture Museum, and finally Ho Chi Minh City for a little taste of Vietnam!

Yes, and people will start saying things like "Dont act smart, Crazy travel alone, waste money go to such lousy places." Well my perspective of travel is different, its definitely not the "all shop and eat" crap most Singaporeans often go for. Travelling solo is better because its difficult to find friends who enjoys roughing it out:(

Finally after a few weeks of getting my leave approved, my tickets are finally booked and its time for me to board the plane again to pursue my passion for travel:)

alone in the snow...9:56 AM

My First Post for 2010:D

Yes, Im back from Finland, as I had for the past 1 year:( And then I decided to continue using this blog to remind myself the importance of having to return to Finland or nearby to stay forever:D

Though it was only about 8 months I stayed there, being alone in a faraway land certainly made me more independent, and thankful for the many things I have here; my parents, a nice home, basically everything is well taken care of.

After deciding to go against my typical "Kiasi" mentality, I bought a one way ticket to Greece, where I met many great folks like Anastasia and Muluken. Very Awesome people and I certainly do miss them till now:( I volunteerted to help out at a refugee shelter for two days, serving food to the many refugees from Africa and the Middle East. As usual, I was greeted with "curious stares" because 99% has never seen a Singaporean Chinese before:D I was pickpocketed on the metro, but had nothing in my bag, ahhhh stupid fat Pickpocket, rob a stingy Singaporean:D

Then I flew straight to Berlin, arrived too late and ended up taking the most expensive taxi trip ever ($100 Singapore Dollars). I was pissed, but thankful I got there safetly.
I met Michelle Verma (Singaporean) at the Brandenburg gate, a highly enthusiastic and successful sportsperson: She will be the host for the Swimming events for the Youth Olympics in Singapore. She was nice enough to take me around berlin, got me drunk and had me finding my way back to the hostel:D Kinda sucks when she left for Singapore a day later:(

After two nights in Berlin (One of my favourite places), I took an 9 hour bus to Warsaw, the Capital of Poland. People think im stupid: Why visit such a crappy place? Why not visit Paris/ Rome/ Milan? Point is, Im not that kind of fool to visit such places and come back to Singapore and boast to all those who havent visited, and besides, I hate the French:D jk!

Warsaw was culturally enriching. I visited the Warsaw uprising museum, where bone chilling experiences of the World War and Holocaust were documented. Never seen before footage of torture and suffering brought me to tears, really. I have to return one day:) Ate kebabs during the two days in Warsaw and made friends with the boss:) I was kinda afraid the whole time there as I really felt someone was following me, especially during the night. Not a very safe capital actually.

Upon deciding not to stay for another night (Not too tourist friendly), I managed to purchase a 14 Hour bus ticket to Latvija, the murder capital of the world ( I didnt have a choice:) Halfway through, the bus driver dragged me out of my seat and started scolding me for being in his "space". I was stunned as I didnt understand Polish. I quickly changed seats to avoid being thrown off the bus in Kaunas (Lithuania). Arrived in Riga, Spent a few hours there before catching the next bus to my dearest Estonia.

Once I arrived in Tallinn, I felt as though I arrived home:) I couldnt find my hostel and ended up in another one, where I was lucky to meet Tae Yamashita (Japanese) and Marcello Miorelli (Italian). I acted like the tour guide and took Tae to a nearby Chinese Restaurant where I ate (Bee cheng fried rice:D) We had a good time before she had to leave for Helsinki the next day...

Spent the whole day walking around the old town, and managed to get my brother loads of rare Russian Medals. Left my dearest city the next day and arrived back in Helsinki, where I was greeted with Yellow and Orange (Autumn has arrived). I returned back to Jyvaskyla and stayed with Mikael for another two nights. Before I realised it, I was already back in Singapore.

Here I am now:(:( working in a restaurant Kitchen at Holland Village, pursuing my passion of cooking, although I know il never be a chef. Life back here is tough, and I miss everyone in Finland: Anne Pekkonen, Antti Immonen, Mikko, Joni, Riku, Juho and so many more:(
I didnt manage to get into any one of the Local Unis. Apart from not being able to get in, I refused to apply because I am game on returning overseas to live my life, filled with freedom and independence:)

I was glad, VERY GLAD as the University of Manchester (Really good uni:D, offered me a place in Marketing and Management. But I hope they will allow me to defer till 2012, once my army ends. Hopefully by then, the World Still doesnt end;D

Nat is back and it feels SO GOOD to see her again, considering I havent seen her for two years, that she is one of my best and longest friend I have ever MADE:D Goota meet up with her often before she leaves and I become tied to the government:D

Jordan

alone in the snow...6:56 PM

Monday August 31

Hello Folks!

It has been so long since ive blogged! Here are the many updates you guys have missed out:

I am blogging this post while sitting on the cold hard floor:( I have managed to sell my furniture to another Chinese guy, at double the amount I paid for:D My apartment is empty now, and it feels exactly the same as when I first shifted in... I surely going to miss this place very badly. This was where, for the first time, I learnt to live on my own, cook my own food, do my own laundry, call home in a foreign land. I never once felt like coming back to Singapore; During uncomfortable situations and crappy scenarios, Pellonreuna 2 was the first place I wanted to seek comfort and security in.

6 months flew like a bullet, and right after this post, this laptop goes into my bag and off I leave for my friend's apartment. I simply cannot believe that time flew so fast, and in a couple of weeks time, I have to restart the hectic lifestyle in my original "home" called Singapore. No more sitting in the woods admiring the trees and their colours.... No more lying on my bed appreciating the beautiful portraits in the sky... no more.... no more Youtube Marathons:D

Thank you so much Heidi and Lauri for helping me to shift all my furniture... It was demanding and tough but you cared anough to help... Kiitos paljon!

I shant talk about work. As usual, work has been great day by day: When I needed to work long hours, they gave me too many hours out of generosity... When I needed break, they gave me a whole week off:D This is another problem il have to deal with when i return to my shithole. Working at SOL was God Send. I have never had so much fun working in a crappy job. Also, the money was more than enough to pay for my Europe trip in two weeks time!

Autumn is quickly approaching... leaves are turning red and yellow... Midnight sun is far from over... the sun now rises are 5.30am and set at 8.30pm... Near 0 Degree nights are getting common. Well thats all I have to say really... feeling really low about coming back:( I think I shall put my lappie in my bag now:(

Kovski

alone in the snow...7:51 PM

June 25 Thursday, temp 26C

Hello Folks! It has been a while since I last blogged!

A heat wave is currently over Finland. Temperatures are well over 20C but below 30s. Wow... 23C and people here say its too hot... WHAT ABOUT SINGAPORE, where people wear hoodies and jackets when the temperatures falls below 28 LOL?

Im pretty much getting back to my normal life here in Finland... When my brother came, suddenly everything about Singapore re-entered my mind: Char Kway Teow, violent thunderstorms, friends (04!!!) and family, Hokkien Mee etc etc. but it seems pretty weird that I never thought of going back! And then when he left, it felt as though I was rudely smacked back into loneliness:( I didnt want to see anyone and nearly fell into the realm of becoming an introvert! Fortunately divine intervention (God) help me get back on my feet in just under a day!!!

Well just a few good news... After having to wait for so long, Sokos finally hired me for the summer job!! I dont have to worry about stinging on food and can finally buy some stuff for myself!:D Money is really good... therefore I hope to bring some back when I return to Singapore!

just for your information... I am currently working at Fransmanni Ravintola Kitchen!! Its really really fun and exciting.... cutting all sorts of weird vegetables, fingers, making salads and if im lucky... I can even help do some cooking! Everyone seems so nice and leaving work is always the most difficult part of each day!!:)

I believe the die hard Kiasuism in me is taking its too... 0.50€ discount for a packet of Sausages, I ended up buying 5 + a whole box of chicken fillet!!:D Looks like im not going to starve anytime soon!!

And the link to my Helsinki, Tallinn and Riga photos are up! Do comment and enjoy the pics! To start, go to page 11 and see them backwards!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/39725947@N08/

kovski

alone in the snow...1:44 PM

Hello Fellow readers!!

Im finally back from what I term as "THE BEST HOLIDAY OF MY LIFE!" For most who are wondering where we (My brother and I) went, they were Helsinki, Tallinn (Estonia) and Riga (Latvija). We spent two nights in each city, soaking up the sights and buying lots of local produce and souvenirs! I shan't elaborate further as I will write out every single bit of this exciting exotic adventure to these three places, in the form of the timeline. Hopefully, you can feel the excitement we both felt during the whole journey!

May 31st Sunday
I woke up early in the morning to get my bags packed for the Express train to Helsinki, where I will meet Joshua at Helsingin Rautatieasema (Railway), who will take a bus from Vantaa Airport upon his arrival. I hurriedly packed my stuff and rushed out of my apartment, not realising that I have left my door keys inside. This literally placed me in a situation where I was "LOCKED OUT OF MY APARTMENT!" I was pissed that this had to happen on my holiday... I left for the railway station anyway as I didn't want to miss my train.

I met Martine, an Argentinian guy living in the neighbourhood. He happened to be going to Helsinki too, to do some UNICEF work. Hopped on the pretty crappy but cheap train to Tampere. Unexpectedly, the train arrived late and I only had one minute to make the dash for the next train to Helsinki. I made it fortunately and arrived Helsinki before two in the afternoon.

The Finnish summer scene is a world away from what Winter had to offer: Green trees, wild flowers springing up everywhere, sapphire blue lakes, the warm sun. The heatwave apparently pushed temperatures up all the way to near 30s! Seems like "takatalvi" isn´t coming anytime soon:D

As mentioned previously, I visited Pasila (a suburb located less than 5km from Helsingin Keskusta) a few months back for a short presentation, and therefore didn´t get the opportunity to visit Helsinki Centre. This explains why I am so excited for this trip!

Upon my arrival at the Helsinki Railway Station, it seemed as though I was thrown 200 years back; Italian renaissance styled buildings built along tree-lined cobble-stoned streets. It was BEAUTIFUL... I could live here FOREVER:D

Helsinki is interestingly different from Jyväskylä: Bustling Capital spiced up with a concoction of people from all over the globe, crowded and "happening!" I managed to check into Klaus K Hotelli, a four star stylish boutique hotel located just hundred metres from the famous Stockmann Departmental store and Kamppi (If Harrolds of London is 1st, Stockmann is top 10!!). The reception was nice enough to upgrade us to a bigger room as the housekeeping department didn´t manage to finish cleaning up the standard rooms on time!:D Waited for Joshua to arrive at Helsinki Rautatieasema. I gave him a BIG BIG HUG as I havent seen him for a long time! Helped him with his luggage, which weighed the equivalent of two tank shells, 400 bullets and four Lee Enfield rifles:D

We didn´t have time to waste! Upon settling down, we made our way to Suomenlinna, a UNESCO World heritage site (Sea Fortress) located just 15 minutes boat ride from the Helsinki Market Place. The scenery there was undescribable: Well preserved castles set along the edge of the cliff overlooking the Capital, people picnicing everywhere, birds were singing, flowers blooming... I don´t know LOL! I will let the pictures do the talking;D

Returned to Helsinki where we took a stroll along the many cobble-stoned roads before heading to one of those typical "Lebanese Pizzerias" for dinner!

On day two, we visited Linnanmäki, the Oldest and the "best" theme park in Finland. The entry pass costs us a hefty €35 per person! However, it turned out to be well worth it! We took rides that scared the shit out of us when we were young and it FELT GOOD:D We spent half a day there before visiting Hesburger (Better than Crappy Old Mcdonalds), and then back to the hotel to prepare for our trip to Tallinn, the capital of Estonia. i was lucky not to have purchased the ferry tickets in advance as we found out that Linda Line offered high speed catamaran rides to Tallinn at only 70% of the price we would otherwise have to pay on Tallink Silja or the Viking Line!

Day three: Joshua got up very early as usual as he was suffering from a little jetlag (6am). Washed up, changed and packed out luggage for our first ever trip to the Baltic States! Breakfast at Klaus K was fantastic as usual... their cheese cake tasted DIVINE, BUT DEFINITELY NOT AS GOOD AS MY DEAREST SUPERVISOR ANNE PEKKONEN'S SUPER CREAMY CHEESE CAKE! Checked-out of the hotel and made our way to the International ferry terminal for our ride to Tallinn! Fortunately, as Estonia and Latvia are part of the Eurozone, no formal boder checks are required! The ferry was pretty decent, similar to the Bintan Resort ferries of Singapore! Seas were calm and we arrived at Tallinn in under two hours!

Just a short short intro of the Estonian Capital. Tallinn is a city of 400000+ inhabitants, with 40% of them RUSSIANS:D It has existed since Medieval times as was known as Reval. Their lingo are typically Russian and Estonian (Closely related to finnish!) We were greeted by this HUGE Brutalist style Monolith when we arrived. I have no idea what the building is for but it looked freaky:D walked a good 20 minutes before arriving at Sokos Hotell Viru, the tallest hotel in Estonia with stunning views over the Old town! Settled down, changed some Estonian Kroon and headed to the Old town!

Estonians are really interesting. A majority of them spoke only Estonian (A variation of Finnish) and Russian... This therefore made the leg of our journey challenging as we had problems trying to communicate with the locals. My bargaining skills went completely limp as it fell victim to language problems:(

The Estonian Old town is breath taking... Words itself can't do any justice to the description of the town! Again, Il let the tons of pictures do the talking:D Managed to get 10 bottles of Viru Valge (find out what that is!) for Juho.. Alcohol apparently cost half of what you pay for in Finland. Spent two nights visiting interesting places such as the torture museum, Old town square, Viru Keskus shopping mall, a typical ´Soviet style´neighbourhood (Seemed unsafe and dangerous... but it was a great experience nonetheless!), flea markets, museums and many other places!

After Tallinn, we took a 30min walk from our hotel to the Odra, where the international bus station is located. It started raining heavily (And worsened while we were in Riga, where the temperatures dipped to as low as 5C... the coldest June days in 60 YEARS!!) The bus drove through Pärnu, along the gulf of Riga... and on towards Latvija!

At first sight, Riga seemed really frightening; badly deteriorating buildings, rugged landscape, giant brutlalist styled apartments and buildings. I was thinking to myself, ´Why on earth are we here?!?!?!

Upon arrival at the Riga bus station, it seemed as though we were in Moscow! Everyone spoke Russian and looked like murderers (joking):D As Latvija, let alone Riga has a tiny asian population, it is of no surprise that everyone kept staring at us while we were walking to our hotel... I can´t blame them: I can almost safetly say that Riga has got not more than 20 Asians? lol! It certainly felt good to be getting all the attention!! We walked through the massive Central Market, and realised that our hotel was located in a badly declining neighbourhood, right in front of a church! It was nice and quiet though, and the reception was kind enough to upgrade us to a much bigger room! The view directly faced the church and it was so tranquil and amazing!

As today happened to be our birthday, we decided to treat ourselves to Japanese food... YES JAPANESE FOOD IN WHO KNOWS WHERE LOL! We ended up in a high end japanese restaurant in the middle of the old town. Interestingly, the head chef himself was japanese! The food tasted great and costs us only 4 Lats per person ( 4 x 1.5 x 2 = 12 SGD!). As it was raining and the temperatures seemed reluctant to rise, we went indoors to the Central market! Lucky for us, this period happens to be a the first harvest of the berry season after winter. Therefore 8 out of 10 stalls were selling TONS of STRAWBERRIES, BLUE BERRIES, RASPBERRIES, APRICOTS, CHERRIES ETC ETC LOL! And believe me, the air smelt sweet of all the delicious fruits! People bought them in huge baskets and sacks! We managed to get out hands on some of course...from this Russian Lady who understood my singaporean version of Russian :D

Bought some Vanilla cream before heading back to our hotel! The fruits tasted SO SWEET! There wasn´t even a sour hint! On our next day, we visited the Old town, which wasn´t as well preserved as the one in Tallinn, but still beautiful and picturesque:D Visited the gunpowder tower, where the city museum is located, ate Russian Food for Lunch (ABSOLUTELY
DELICIOUS!) It was here where I met my FIRST Russian love: Kvass! Made using roasted Rye bread, fermented with yeast, sugar, raisins, Kvass taste really interesting, with it´s own unique character and texture (Milky). I will definitely learn how to make them!

Woke up the next morning and headed to Lagalite Flea Market (Latvia's black market). We didnt manage to find as many war antique shops as we had anticipated. The flea market sold almost everything under the sun: telephone cables, computer parts, war stuff, guns, items blacksmiths use, spolit machines, bicycles etc. It was pretty interesting! After spending an hour there, we headed back to our hotel to grab our luggage and take the public bus to Lidoste Airport (16km away) We dragged our luggage for about 400m and took the public bus, which costs us 50santimus each! Soaked up some sights along the way and before we knew it, we were already at the airport waiting for our flight! It was most unfortunate that Ryanair check-in counter staff did not accept out boarding passes as they said that we had printed them wrongly. SO we had to fork out 58Lats (70€) for the new passes... Cheap rip off airlines!

But I was glad that we purchased the priority boarding passes, which allowed us to choose our own seats! Flew over Estonia, Gulf of Finland and after 55minutes, we landed safetly at Pirkkala Lentoasema (Tampere). Spent over 40min trying to look for our hotel. Got knocked out once we arrrived at our rooms!

Woke up the next morning to catch our pendolino train to Jyväskylä and that ended our exciting unforgettable trip to the Baltics! We didnt let fear get in our way ( like most traditional Singaporeans: Kiasu and Kiasi), experienced new and exotic cultures and of course, lived like the locals, learnt to take care of ourselves and be independent! I will definitely go back to Estonia as there were many things we didnt buy while we were there. Also, I plan to move further South, towards Lietuva (Lithuania) and maybe Poland etc! I really hope I can make it... but first, time to get the Hotel job! Pictures will be out soon so hang in there folks!

Kovski

alone in the snow...10:53 AM

Hello Readers!

Wow... its so fast, I have already spent half my internship in Finland:( Ive grown to like this place, Summer is really one BIG DREAM! Friends and really nice people at work. Ahhhh! Im really stuck in this possibly typical situation as to stay in Finland in the future, or return to Singapore! When you're here, you realise how pathetic things can get in Singapore; Governance, work environment, WEATHER, lifestyle etc:(

Life seems so relaxed here and im really loving it:D In Finland, lifestyle and environment naturally leads one on to living to a ripe old age. Whereas in Singapore, Vitamins, man-made supplements, surgery, medicines, painful injections allows you to live on much longer. Healthcare in fully covered in Finland, therefore no one has to worry about falling ill or allowing loved ones to carry the burden of financial costs. It's the other way round in Singapore most unfortunately: People rather be dead once they fall ill. Welfare, Communism, or Self-sufficient? Im for welfare and communism:D

Anyway, the housekeeping part of my training is over. Im definitely going to miss Liisa (my CLOSEST working partner!) She has helped me temendously for the past two months! Its sad when she came over, thanking me for all the help ive provided her for for the past two months:...( Eeva promised to hire me from July Onwards, instead of June. Thats why I have been feeling really upset and "cheated". Whatever it is, Im going to the Population registrar Office to get my Social Security Pass to grab the job. Its weird for a guy I know, but I really love working in the housekeeping dept. Thats why I will extend my visa for another month, hopefully CMPB will grant it, as well as the Finnish Poliisi, fingers crossed yet again:)

Time or my two weeks break!:D Summer is out in full force, with next weeks temperature soaring to a high 28C. Im off to Helsinki once more for my first official holiday with my brother!! We plan to visit Suomenlinna Fortress, Stockmann, Linnanmaki theme park etc etc. We shall spend a few days there before hopping on the Tallink to Estonia, spend time in their old town... drink some Viru Valge (local spirits). Afterwhich, we'll hop on to a coach to Riga, Latvija:D I really can't wait!!

Thats all for the week folks! I will try to blog during my trip so do look back!:D

Kovski

alone in the snow...10:00 AM